A Child's Day in Ski School

OK, so you’ve left your child in the (hopefully) capable hands of their ski instructor, and paid handsomely for the privilege. What happens next?
First, have confidence in your decision. Initial separation can be tough, especially for smaller children – no parent wants to feel like they’ve terrified and traumatized their little one by leaving them with a bunch of strangers. The tears will end faster, however, if you make a quick exit. Let them know that they are in good hands, and tell them what time you’ll come get them. Then go. This gives their instructor the chance to bond with them and start to establish trust, which is crucial to any child’s learning. If they don’t feel safe, they won’t learn. I’ve had only the smallest handful of instances where I couldn’t get a child to stop crying and get excited about going skiing. The parents’ lingering there only gives the child the hope of an “out” – maybe Mom/Dad will just give in and I won’t have to stay here!

Next, separate your expectation of the perfect day with the reality of a day in the mountains.

Expectation #1:
Your child’s instructor skis off with the group following in a graceful and orderly line, excited for a day of adventure.

Reality:
This almost never actually happens. Someone forgot a glove, or their goggles. Someone immediately has to go to the bathroom. Someone’s parents completely mis-judged their child’s ability, and the instructor must then scramble to make a change. This last is probably the worst. Instead of being off skiing, the group has to, at best, wait for the instructor to resolve the problem or, at worst, try to accommodate one skier who is much faster or slower than the rest. Frustration for everyone!

Expectation #2:
Little will ski as many runs today as I will.

Reality:
This never happens (caveat: unless your 7 year-old is an accomplished expert). First, they are small and get tired, especially if the conditions are other than optimal. Second, it takes longer to get a group down the hill than it does and individual or two. Ditto for loading chairlifts, getting lunch, going to the restroom … just about anything. It’s like herding cats sometimes. Third, it is a lesson, after all, and time is spent talking, demonstrating and practicing. The first time I take beginners up the “big” chairlift, it can take 45 minutes to get to the bottom. I can ski this run by myself in about 8.

Expectation #3:
Little will learn the finer intricacies and technical details of skiing.

Reality:
Little is 9 and doesn’t care. Little just wants to ski well enough to keep up with Mom, Dad, Sibling(s) or Friends. And have fun. My #1 goal is for Little to be safe, then Little can learn new things and have a good time. It is key to instill in a child an understanding of what is safe in the mountain environment and what isn’t, so they can make smart decisions for themselves. “Is it safe or not?” is the one thing that probably underpins just about every decision I make in a lesson. This applies to your child’s behavior as well as the slopes I choose and the skills I decide to teach.

Maybe Little tells you “we played games all day.” Dig deeper – what were those games? What did you learn from them? It’s a talented ski instructor who can keep your child so entertained that they don’t even know they’re learning.

Expectation #4:
Little will be perfectly matched in a group of kids who ski just like her.

Reality:
Also never happens. Even kids who can, technically, all get down the same run, will do it differently. There will always be a spectrum of skill levels in any group, as well as a spectrum of learning styles. Not every drill will work for every kid, and Little’s instructor should have a handy “bag of tricks” – a variety of methods of teaching the same skill to different people.

Expectation #5:
Little will be your most perfect angel all day.

Reality:
This does actually happen, and more often than you might think. I can count on one hand (not using my thumb) the times when I’ve had a child who was really, truly awful. Mostly, I’ve had really fun, funny, interesting, smart, nice kids. Lucky me! That said, at the resort where I work, we have a “we teach the whole child” approach. This means that yes, skiing is emphasized, but we don’t ignore other things. If Little’s manners were exceptionally good, or monstrously bad, I will tell parents. You have to know the good, the bad & the ugly. You also have to know what your child did that day – where she skiied, what skills she worked on, and what’s next for her. Mostly, though, you just want to hear that resounding “YEEAAHHHH!” when you ask Little “did you have fun?”

There are a lot of really good reasons to put your child in ski school. Sometimes separating a child out of the family dynamic gives them a chance to take risks and make discoveries they might not otherwise. There is less pressure about pleasing Mom & Dad, or keeping up with siblings. Maybe you and your spouse want a day to yourselves. Maybe your kid is such an unrelenting brat that you can’t stand to be around him (ok, just kidding). Maybe you’ve tried to teach the little one to ski, and it ended up in a tantrum – yours or theirs, I’ve seen both.

There are several key things you want to know when you are booking a lesson for Little (the generic name I’ll use for anyone’s kid):

* If it’s a group lesson, what is the maximum group size? When you hear the answer, think about it. 10 nine-year-olds? Chances are, that instructor will spend more time on crowd control than teaching. As with adults, the group setting can be really fun for kids, but think about your particular child’s needs. Especially if they are unusual.

It’s a sticky subject, but learning disabilities and personality disorders are an issue. I have had parents drop off children without saying a word about problems that made it unsafe for their child to ski in a group setting. I understand their desire for their child to share an experience with his or her peers, but safety – of your child as well as others in the class -- has to be the first and foremost consideration. If you are unsure, talk to the ski school about your child’s specific issues and they can recommend the safest option.

* What level skier is Little? Some resorts will ask you this on the phone when you book your lesson. Be honest, be conservative. If this will be Little’s first day skiing since last year, he may not start up exactly where he left off the year before. It’s also easier for Little to learn new skills if he isn’t so challenged that it’s all he can do just to stay upright. This is also something to deal with the day of Little's lesson, but that's another post.

* Is lunch included, and what is a typical menu? Set your kids’ expectations -- they may have had a really tasty grilled cheese sandwich when they had lunch with you, but ski school lunch choices may be more limited. Also, make sure you can request a special meal if your child has allergies or dietary restrictions.

* Get a grip on the logistics. This is better done early than late – you’d be amazed how hard it can be to get out of the house with all that gear. Find out how much time you’ll need to get through the rental shop and to the designated ski school drop-off place. Then add 15-20 minutes for the unexpected. At the resort where I teach, there is an early drop-off program, so parents can put their kids in ski school and still make it to their own lessons if need be.

* What time does the lesson end, and where? Sounds basic, but it’s that logistics thing again. Also be honest with yourself about how much your child can handle. Did you arrive late the night before, and wake up jet lagged and woozy from the altitude? Maybe picking your child up early that first day will make for a more enjoyable vacation overall. Just confirm with Little’s instructor when & where that can happen.

Ultimately, you want your kid to be safe, have fun, and learn something. Pretty much in that order.